Modems beat women

Some reasons why a modem is better than a woman:A modem doesn't ask for a commitment if you use it. Getting a modem to obey you is as simple as typing "AT".When you're done using your modem, you can roll over and go to sleep without feeling guilty.A modem won't say a word if you come home late.A modem can't collect alimony if you decide to dump it.A modem will always wait patiently by the phone.You can always get a few bucks for an old modem when a faster model comes out.A modem doesn't mind if you call another modem.A virus you catch from your modem doesn't require a trip to the doctor.You don't have to bring a modem home to meet your parents. If an error occurs, Abort, Retry or Fail are the only options you have to worry about.Modems come with an instruction manual. Modems have a volume control - you can even turn the sound OFF.